The Shoe Box

First Lesson: Job 1:1, 2:1-10
Responsive Reading: Psalm 26
Second Lesson: Hebrews 1: 1-4, 2: 5-12
​Gospel Lesson: Mark 10: 2-16

---

Grace and Peace from Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ,
​
“Love is patient; love is kind.  It does not envy; it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others; it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”-1st Corinthians 13:4-7. 

Let me begin this morning with an old tale[1].  Nasruddin and his friend were having tea one afternoon where the conversation turned to Nasruddin’s love life.

“How come you never got married, Nasruddin?” said his friend.

Nasruddin pondered the question for a moment before sighing. Nasruddin describes spending his youth in pursuit of finding the perfect woman.  He describes journeying all over in this pursuit, he began in Cairo where he met a woman who was beautiful and intelligent, with dark olive eyes, yet deep down her soul was unkind. 

Finally, Nasruddin journeyed to Baghdad where he met a woman whose possessed a kind and generous spirit, yet they did not possess any common interests together.

One woman after another, Nasruddin described meeting.  In the end, there would always be something missing.  Then one day, Nasruddin’s finally believed that he found love, he had finally found a woman that met all his criteria: beautiful, intelligent, kind, and all sorts of common interests[2]. 

“Well, “What happened?  Why didn’t you marry her?”-said the friend[3].

Nasruddin started shaking his head.  “Well, It’s a sad thing.  It seems she was looking for the perfect man[4].”

This story leads us to our Gospel lesson for Today from Mark 10[5]. 

Our lesson has the Pharisees coming up to Jesus asking: “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?

Now here’s a little background into our passage, so you can best understand Jesus and the Pharisees’ discussion.  Divorce was a hot-button issue within Jesus’ day among the rabbis.  It was debated in multiple camps[6].  One group taught that divorce could only be permissible if a man caught his wife in adultery, whereas another group made the argument that divorce could take place for pretty much any reason including not liking their spouse’s cooking[7].  All the arguments about divorce within Jesus’ day were about what degree a man could use divorce to exert control over a woman.

So to better understand Jesus’ position on divorce consider where it is within Mark’s Gospel.  It comes after Jesus’ instructions are for the care of the church regarding young children[8].  Jesus’ comments have to do with divorce’s ramifications in his day being that a woman (who didn’t work outside the home) would be abandoned and destitute if their husbands casually deserted them. 

Jesus’ response to the Pharisees  is “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.[9]”  Jesus then later doubles down by declaring: Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery[10].”

Now, these words jump out in the New Testament because at first glance without any background they seem to absent of any grace or understanding of the situation.

Here’s the thing, we’re dealing with the same Jesus here who defended a woman getting stoned to death for committing adultery, the same Jesus who gave grace to the woman he met at Sychar who had been divorced a seemingly unbelievable five times and was now living with another guy, and the same Jesus who welcomes prostitutes, tax collectors, and other assorted sinners into his presence[11].

Now Jesus’ point in this passage is not to draw the line at a woman living in an abusive relationship who dares thinking of leaving her husband[12]. 

Instead, to best understand this passage, you need to understand the nature of Jesus’ conversation.  Jesus is not being asked about “divorce” by a woman who is clearly hurting because of physical or emotional betrayal[13].  Jesus is not being asked about divorce by a person in need of a word of grace. Jesus is being asked about divorce by the Pharisees. 

Jesus was being asked by people trying to expose him as a hypocrite and fraud to anyone who would listen, by asking about divorce.   Jesus instead flips the question back by referring to the created order of the Genesis story[14]. 

“But at the beginning of creation, God ‘made them male and female. ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh[15].”

Jesus’ statement has to do with the importance of marriage. We live in a society where individual satisfaction can often be the greatest of pursuits, until the very moment when people find it no longer convenient[16].

Britney Spears is a pop music singer born in Louisiana in 1981.  Spears has sold over 100 million records worldwide[17].  In 2004, she was visiting Las Vegas with a hometown friend, when on a whim they decided to get married[18].  They got married at 5:30 A.M. in a Vegas wedding chapel, only for Spears to awaken regretting what she had done.

By Monday morning a petition for annulment was filed declaring: “Before entering into the marriage the plaintiff and defendant did not know each other’s likes and dislikes, each other’s desires to have or not have children, and each other’s desires as to state of residency. Upon learning of each other’s desires, they are so incompatible that there was a want of understanding of each other’s actions in entering into this marriage[19].”

Britney Spears’ marriage to Jason Allen Alexander ended up lasting officially 55 hours.   This story highlights a world that is often too casual about the extent of marriage, how its brokenness can easily be shrugged off. 

Jesus is letting the Pharisees know that he didn’t take such a casual attitude to marriage as they implied.  Jesus is instead making the point whenever marriage ends is tragic for whatever reason. 

Pete Rose. Sr. was possibly the worst husband a woman could have.  Pete Sr. repeatedly chased other women while married and said all sorts of nasty put downs to his wife besides.  Pete’s son Pete Jr. became a decent Baseball player in his own right.  He had a shot at the big leagues.  His parents had been divorced for years when he said: “I would trade whatever future I have in big league baseball to see my parents get back together.”

These were the wishes of an adult child long moved out of the family home.  It speaks to divorce’s brokenness of many levels[20].

Jesus’ words on divorce are tough because they speak to pain caused by broken human relationships both those directly involved and the innocent bystanders.  So Jesus within this passage is seeking to address the attitude with which people in his day would approach divorce, especially as it negatively affected both woman and their children.  We must understand these words within the larger context of scripture which continually deals with God’s forgiveness and the new beginnings that such forgiveness brings[21]. 

God does not bless or celebrate divorce.  God weeps along those who experience it!

For despite the best intentions that people have when they make wedding vows; life happens.  People mess up; our loved ones disappoint us, people can’t control their temper, they develop addictions, they drift apart.  We sin with our minds, our tongues, and other parts of our body[22]. 

Jesus’ great point on Divorce takes place when he encounters the woman caught in adultery in John 8. “I do not condemn you…Go and sin no more.[23]”  Jesus is saying no matter how broken your past relationships have been; I can forgive you, so that you may have new life both personally and spiritually going forward. 

The scriptures continually grant forgiveness to those from the most broken of relationships.  David committed adultery with Bathsheba.  David heard a word of harsh judgment from Nathan then suffered his sin’s consequences.  David though was granted a new beginning.  David and Bathsheba got married and their son Solomon became King over Israel[24].  The story reminds us that while they are inevitable breaking points within a marriage, there are no breaking points to the Love of God.  God will not give up on us even when we are at our most broken.  What our Gospel message reminds us of is the following.  No matter how broken your past relationships have been, do not feel shame, do not feel guilt, leave your burdens behind.  In Christ, a message of hope and resurrection has been given unto you many times over. 

Let me close with one final story for Today to illustrate exactly what these means.  This illustration might work within a marriage, but it is more representative of the Love of God.  How in the words that I began with from 1st Corinthians that our love may be imperfect, but God’s love is perfect.  

Once upon a time, there was a couple that had been married sixty years[25].  They talked about everything.  They kept no secrets from each other.  The wife only had one request for her husband, never look into the shoe box on top of the bedroom closest.  The husband followed this advice for every year of the marriage.  Finally, the wife grew very ill.  It became clear that her days were numbered.  In needing to settle their affairs, she instructed her husband to bring down the shoe box.  He opened the box saw two things: two croqueted dollies and a huge stack of money it must have been thousands of dollars.

The wife began to explain. “When we were to be married," she said, "my grandmother told me the secret of marriage was never to argue.  She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doily[26].”

The husband is so moved that tears come to his eyes hearing that the wife had only been mad at him twice in sixty years of marriage.  He’s beaming with happiness as he says “Honey that explains the doilies, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from[27]?"

"Oh," she said, "That’s the money I made from selling the doilies[28]." 

Relationships are hard and might inevitability break with this lifetime, yet the love of God for us will ultimately never break
. 
Amen
 


[1] Stier, Leon. “She’s Perfect, But…” Email Meditations. 29.May.2017. Web. Aug.28.2018.  Taken from  Rick Fields in Chop Wood, Carry Water, page 35.
[2] Stier, Leon. “She’s Perfect, But…” Email Meditations.
[3] Stier, Leon. “She’s Perfect, But…” Email Meditations.
[4] Stier, Leon. “She’s Perfect, But…” Email Meditations.
[5] Mark 10:2-16
[6] Juel, Donald.H. “Divorce and Forgiveness: The Way of the Cross- Markan Texts for Late Pentecost.” Word and World. Volume XIV. Number 3. Summer 1994. Web. Aug.27.2018
[7] Juel, Donald.H. “Divorce and Forgiveness: The Way of the Cross- Markan Texts for Late Pentecost.” Word and World.
[8] Mark 9:38-50.
[9] Mark 10:9
[10] Mark 10:11-12
[11] Hoezee, Scott. “Mark 10:2-16.” Center for Excellence in Preaching. 28.Sept.2015. Web. Aug.26.2018
[12] Hoezee, Scott. “Mark 10:2-16.” Center for Excellence in Preaching.
[13] Hoezee, Scott. “Mark 10:2-16.” Center for Excellence in Preaching.
[14] Hoezee, Scott. “Mark 10:2-16.” Center for Excellence in Preaching.
[15] Mark 10:6-8.
[16] Hoezee, Scott. “Mark 10:2-16.” Center for Excellence in Preaching.
[17] Spears, Britney. Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia. Wikimedia Foundation. 24.Aug.2018. Web. Aug.26.2018. 
[18] Today Show. “Judge dissolves Britney's 'joke' wedding.”NBC 4.Jan.2004. Web. Aug.26.2018.
[19] Today Show. “Judge dissolves Britney's 'joke' wedding.”NBC
[20] Sermon Illustrartions. “Divorce” Web. Aug.26.2018. Taken from Jerry Jenkins, Hedges, Wolgemuth & Hyatt, 1989, p. 128.
[21] Stier, Leon. “Divorce and Remarriage (part two of two).” Email Mediations. 27.Mar.2014. Web. Aug.26.2018. 
[22] Stier, Leon. “Divorce and Remarriage (part two of two).” Email Mediations.
[23] John 8:11.
[24] Stier, Leon. “Divorce and Remarriage (part two of two).” Email Mediations.
[25] Zingale, Tim. “Marriage.” Sermon Central. 2.Oct.2006. Web. Aug.26.2018. 
[26] Zingale, Tim. “Marriage.” Sermon Central.
[27] Zingale, Tim. “Marriage.” Sermon Central.
[28] Zingale, Tim. “Marriage.” Sermon Central.